Peter Pan Syndrome – Definition, Symptoms, Treatment, Causes, Test

What is Peter Pan Syndrome?

Peter Pan Syndrome is a disorder in which a man is unable to grow into maturity. They may grow physically as an adult but choose to hang on to their childhood in avoidance of assuming responsibility like a mature person. They are men who stay as boys inside. They are also imprisoned in the result given by the freedom of youth. The term “Peter Pan syndrome” is derived from the book “Peter Pan” written by J.M. Barrie about a boy who doesn’t want to grow up and lives in Neverneverland where people do not grow old. Peter pan syndrome can affect both men and women, but it is most often seen in the male population.

Peter Pan Syndrome symptomsPeter Pan Syndrome symptoms & signs

What are the Symptoms of Peter Pan Syndrome?

Signs and symptoms are based on the following:

  • Either excessive outbursts of emotion or blunt in affect.
  • Anger to the point of wrath
  • Happiness that turns into extreme panic
  • Frustration that leads to self-pity and depression.
  • They have difficulty expressing feelings of love
  • They always feel guilty
  • Difficulty relaxing
  • Undependable
  • Manipulative tendencies

Individuals with this syndrome have a hard time building strong and genuine relationship with peers; as a result they feel extremely alone. They are also not bothered by the wrong things that they have done, instead they blame others for their frailties. They tend to move away from real problems concerning their weaknesses, which can cause them to use prohibited drugs and abuse alcohol in an attempt to escape the obstacles of life.

What Causes Peter Pan Syndrome?

Overprotective Parents

According to the top psychologist, Peter Pan Syndrome may be a result of overprotective parents because it hinders the child from growing to maturity and to exhibit their own skills to face life’s challenges. Peter pan syndrome was defined by psychologist Dan Kiley, in 1983. According to him, in every Peter Pan there is a shadow of a “Wendy”. Thus, he also used the term “Wendy Syndrome” for those women who act behind their partners and friends as a motherly figure.

Link with Narcissism

Peter Pan Syndrome is related to narcissism, but not in the egotistical sense. They tend to be absorbed with imaginative comfort in their minds which attractes them to introspection. This leads them to be imprisoned by childhood fantasy, not the realities and difficulties of life that they need to overcome.


Peter Pan Syndrome is not a genetically inherited syndrome. It is acquired by:

  • Environmental influences, in which an individual may inhibit it by how they were raised by their parents.
  • Factors such as the so-called “Wendy Syndrome”.


It may be diagnosed when an individual exhibits the signs and symptoms of Peter Pan Syndrome. However, this disorder is not yet medically accepted by the WHO (World Health Organization) and not yet acknowledged by the American Psychiatric Association as a mental disorder. It is regarded as Psychopathology.

How to Treat Peter Pan Syndrome

Since Peter Pan Syndrome is not yet recognized as a psychological disorder, there are no defining treatments. There are therapies such as the wilderness therapy, which covers psychodrama, cognitive behavioral therapy, strength-based therapies, solution-focused therapy, transpersonal counseling, family therapy, and other treatment modalities such as:

  • The Healing Sound of Silence. This is where the individual is kept away from refocusing on other things that will lead to addiction, such as watching TV, computer games, Internet, alcohol and drug abuse. Instead, they are focused on the real issues about themselves; they start with the basics on how to learn to face the real problems of life.
  • Embracing the 12 Step Philosophies. This is a wilderness expedition where they go out camping and hiking in four cycles, in which they learn to share their experiences and prepare themselves for the next tour. The 12 philosophies is a program that covers meetings in the field camp and in the community, for them to be able to recognize support systems that are available during the 12 steps program. Since this kind of therapy occurrs during camp outs, adventure based counseling is done. They begin to be aware of the consequences of their actions and not only to focus on themselves. They also learn self care and eventually realize that every individual in the group is a part of the whole system, and that they are a reflection of a family and each and every one of them has a role and a purpose.
  • Transforming into an Effective Adult. This is the so-called “wake up call” for the family, in which a Peter Pan-like person begins to take responsibility. This is the result of the four cycles of wilderness therapy when they begin to be a leader and taking care and reaching out to each and every member of the group.

Even though there is no established cure for the disease, the only time that the person with Peter Pan Syndrome is treated is when the individual shows willingness and awareness of their disorder.


Since Peter Pan Syndrome is still unrecognized as a mental disorder by the American Psychiatric Association and WHO there is no clear prognosis about the disorder. Individuals with this disorder may undergo therapies, but there is still no established way to treat the syndrome.

Life expectancy

Peter Pan Syndrome is still a psychological issue, so there is no established and exact measure of the individual’s life expectancy. The tendency of the person having the disorder to be cured is still unknown.


The major complication of Peter Pan Syndrome for individuals having the disorder is not being able to build strong relationships. They remain unsuccessful at facing fears and responsibilities, and may also acquire other psychological disorders. According to research, people having Peter Pan Syndrome have very low self-esteem, are unmotivated and feel depressed. Individuals having Peter Pan Syndrome do not usually exhibit the self-confidence, motivation and determination that are keys for being successful.


Since Peter Pan Syndrome is a disorder caused by factors during childhood, any prevention measures should be directed at parents and their awareness on how to raise a child. Parenting seminars should be organized, especially for teenage parents so they are aware of techniques to teach their children about responsibilities. However, the environmental factors still need to be considered when raising a child. Proper values and education are important and children should also be surrounded by the right people as role models.

Proofreaded for grammar and quality by Chris on 30/8/2012

Related posts:

57 Responses to “Peter Pan Syndrome – Definition, Symptoms, Treatment, Causes, Test”

  • Brian says:

    Truly, a parent’s action dictate the development of Peter Pan syndrome. For first time parents who do not know how to bring up children, it is better to receive counselling and seek consult from experts in child care.

  • Kate says:

    I see that Peter Pan syndrome results in not being able to be mature and assuming a boy’s role despite mature age. What is the difference then in metal retardation where a person also is not able to mature his mental abilities?

    • levi b says:

      The disease is more psychological as opposed to mental, hence the term mental retardation. Please think before you write, and please spellcheck before you press post comment. Ta. Xxxx

  • Truth says:

    Not that anyone cares but from the gay perspective, the parents and the upbringing have nothing to do with this. Peter Pan syndrome is an epidemic within the gay community and I’ve withnessed the extremes of it as I have aged. As the article states, narcissism is the root cause here which is based on deep self-esteem issues. Just my opinion from the “front lines”.

  • Sami says:

    You guys don’t know what you’re talking about. Your sexual orientation has nothing to do with it I’m a 13 year old straight girl and I have Peter pan syndrome. Over protective parenting can trigger Peter pan syndrome at any age it’s not the only way but it’s a big one. Im one of the lucky teens with pps with a complete baby face and I’m short for my age but that won’t last forever. I won’t et into the details but it’s stinks having pps and ANYBODY can have it

    • Anonymous says:

      But you’re 13?! You ARE still a child!

    • amethyst rose says:

      this makes me laugh… you’re not old enough to have this syndrome

      • Leila says:

        “Old enough?” I’m dealing with a 15 1/2 year old granddaughter with an extreme case of pps and she has told me many times that she “doesn’t want to grow up”…..refuses to “learn” anything that relates to her future life, “expects” that all good things will “just happen” or “oh well”, she completes the picture with rages at anything that does not go her way. Trying to “force reality” on her is my biggest problem so far in 73 years of living….not easy……

      • Anonymous says:

        I agree, ur only a child yet and can make changes in ur life going forward. Wait till ur 48 like we have had experience watching our son go through.

    • Mark says:

      You’re simply not old enough to have this syndrome. Get out little girl.. the adults need to talk about adult things. Go play with your cell phone and post compromising pictures on the Internet like all the other little brainwashed girls.

      • Lauren says:

        how could you possibly know if she has PPS or not? you don’t know the whole story and if that is what you think little girls do all the time, then maybe she is already doing it.

  • Het leven is misschien toch één groot sprookje | What About Men says:

    […] weet je of jouw man een Peter Pan is? Nou simpel, puberaal gedrag, angst voor binding, onverantwoord gedrag, narcisme, manipulatie, […]

  • […] for Peter Pan Syndrome may need new approaches and its efficacy may not yet be fully established according to a research […]

  • Rumu says:

    I am 23+yrs old. i have also same problem but cause is little bit different my parents are not over protective.they are what will be my treatment..thanks…

  • […] were raised by single mothers who were unavailable. Either way, they are stunted, playing out the Peter Pan syndrome, not wanting to grow up, not pursuing their passions, they talk the talk, but often do not walk the […]

  • Anonymous says:

    what about females with these symptoms?

  • Anonymous says:

    I have been involved with a “man” who has PPS. I have been searching for information about him until I was told about PPS recently by a friend. He matches it perfectly. It has been the most undesirable relationship I have ever encountered or want to remember. He was always trying to make me feel I was doing wrong when I tried to discuss anything of importance. My advice, if you find yourself with someone who has it, get out of the relationship ASAP. They try to distort your world by manipulating you. It is horrible! Their lack of self, self esteem and reality is understated in all information I have read. This one also began using drugs as he progressed into his fantasy world and as he was getting older. He actually believes he now is an alien from another world/planet and was a warrior in his past life. and his so called life friends laugh at him. SCARY…… need I say more. They (he) progressively got worse in my opinion. Doctors, make this come to light and help women who find themselves in relationships with PPS types also. I truly believe they will they hurt someone as it gets worse. (e.g. aggressive behavior when questioned). He stole from many to support his newer User habits (marijuana 1st choice is how he began, not even sure how worse it had gotten because I don’t do drugs). After I suspected his problems were getting worse, I did some digging online (watching his habits of web sites visited) only to find BABY porn and TEEN porn. They are very sick individuals and lie extensively to cover their hatred towards women in my opinion. Mommy problems for sure! Believe me when I say it is the exact behaviors as stated above but progresses as they get older. His age now 48. Run women run (for your lives). When any man expects a women to take care of him because he has excuses for always getting into financial or other difficulties, get out!! You deserve better and don’t let him MANIPULATE you in thinking otherwise. It’s their issue, let it be! Did I say RUN already? !!! Sticking around is not good advice from anyone if you want to stay sane. Whatever you do, do not console, sympathize or show compassion. BIG MISTAKE! (and keep your monies hidden).

  • Anonymous says:

    Oh, one more comment. This one had a child I was unaware of and openly admitted he begged his “mommy” to force the women into having an abortion. He stated his “mommy” said “you will have to learn to keep it in your pants and now pay for this child thorough child support. You will learn to appreciate your offspring as you grow up”. Poor gal, poor child. Obviously I knew nothing about him or I would have RAN sooner. Hint, ask a lot of questions, if resistance, get out fast! I feel NO SYMPATHY for these people unless they seek help.

  • Wendy says:

    I would like to share this write-up but I don’t see a “Share” option anywhere on the page. Help, please.

  • MyViews says:

    I think I have Peter Pan syndrome, but probably not for any of the reasons I’ve seen so far. In my case, I think it has to do with feeling like I missed out on a lot of things during my college years (studied more, attended 3 or 4 parties total, no girlfriend). Now that I graduated and have a job, I suddenly feel the urge to catch up on all that I missed. I check out nightclubs and chat up the college girls (it’s a college town). I’m currently dating an 18-year old and I’m 24. Anyone else think this is a symptom of PPS?

    • Anonymous says:

      I think the PPS you are describing is a mild form of the PPS that Michael Jackson had. He missed out on his ENTIRE childhood, and forever after tried to reclaim it. I don’t think he would have denied this at all, seeing as he named his estate “neverland.” In my opinion the first step as with many problems is identifying and admitting the issue. Only then can you begin to stop the tendencies that encompass PPS.

    • Atreestump says:

      I would say: Yes in my opinion, any refusal to mature should be classified as Peter Pan Syndrome…

      I’m 25 and I’m convinced I have Peter Pan Syndrome. I had a very sheltered childhood; my parents wouldn’t let me out of the house unless I was going to school, or church or if I was going to a friend from church’s house. Even those visits were few and far between, and never for more than a few hours. Anything I did that didn’t involve me doing something for “The Lord” was considered Satanic and either they’d (literally) burn it, or make me do it.

      I joined the Army when I was 20, saw way more shit than I care to mention. Now that I’m out, I feel that doing all the things I wasn’t able to do as a kid makes me feel like I’m not missing out, and helps distract me from the PTSD nonsense.

    • Anonymous says:

      I don’t think you have pps. It is most likely only a mild form of regression. Military children tend to do this as well because they tend to have to grow up quicker due to an ever changing environment. So when they hit their early to late twenties they tend to regress some and spend time doing childish things that did not do when they were young. If this sort of behavior last after say 35 then that’s when I would start to worry. And not to sound sexist but men tend to age slower emotionally then females. So while you are twenty four and she is eighteen emotionally it could be that you are closer to the same age emotionally then your physical ages. If say you were twenty four and she was fifteen or sixteen then you would have more cause to worry.

  • Anonymous says:

    What’s the opposite of pps?

  • Darryl says:

    I have PPS and am 55 yes old and live a very happy life, i keep to my self and have freinds that know i have PPS, my sexuall orentation is Gay but this dose not have a bearing on my PPS/ lifestyle .!! !im cool with how i am .

  • Annonymous says:

    I’m afraid I am also a victim to the PPS. I’m a 28-year-old woman, single, still living with her parents, have two part-time jobs (one in fast food of all places) despite of my college degree. My bedroom is decked out with stuffed animals everywhere and a hugeass doll collection above my bed. My room is always a mess, I hate doing chores at home (keyword: at home; work is another story), and when my parents need me while I’m in the middle of an online conversation or writing one of my books, I either lash out or make my annoyance known to them. My interests include going to anime/manga/gaming conventions, cosplay (and spending a lot of money buying costumes, XD), and playing video games from my childhood, Pokémon in particular. I despise children; I find them to be a nuisance more than anything, and I find myself wanting to slap the crap out them half of the time for their crying, whining, and whatnot. I also find them as a responsibility I have no desire on taking; I’d rather pawn them off to my parents so I can have some constant me time or to a friend who wants kids. As for relationships, I long to find a Peter Pan with the same interests and outlook on life with me. Thought I found him, though we never really became an item, but he ended up becoming a “Wendell Darling” instead and left our private Neverland for good. Call me a selfish b**** who needs a swift kick in the butt, but I’m proud to be Petra Pan. Grow up? Now why would I want to do that?

    • Anonymous says:

      my boyfriend has pps. i don’t know if he knows he has it. he doesn’t talk to anyone about anything personal, not even me. i want to be with a man, not an immature 40 year old. i want to leave him but i also would like to find him another girlfriend, if possible. (he doesn’t know this. i don’t know how he’d react to me finding him someone else). he works but he wants NO responsibility whatsoever. he says he hates kids, but he seems to be good with them. to the 28 year old woman who wrote the above statement, he loves video and internet games. if you have some type of plan for a future (he doesn’t) please get a hold of me. i feel like im leaving a helpless child behind so before i leave i want to try to leave him in hands where he might be taken care of and hopefully mature. i know this is not a dating site, but he desperately needs help. i care too much about him to not at least try to help him be able to survive on his own.

  • I DISAGREE with this and here is why… | Firey Me says:

    […] […]

  • What is Peter Pan Syndrome? « The Power Within Women says:

    […] Source […]

  • What is Peter Pan Syndrome? | Healthy News says:

    […] Source: Dr. Amarendra […]

  • ray says:

    I am 66 and have PPS. I don’t feel any different than when I was 18. I hang out with 20 somethings and am gay. Im into bodybuilding a s speak slang as 20 somethings . Use word “dude” extensively. Have 4 college degrees and still see myself as a student. MANY people say ive been sheltered. I do look young for my age. Still have that promiscuous sexual mentality that college students have and brag about sex conquests. Talk about straight sex since im im bi. Prefer sex partners 18-27. Took pps test and I scored age 22.

  • Peter Narc says:

    I am a self-aware narcissist with acute, chronic Peter Pan syndrome. I’ve been aware of that for decades. I’m okay with it. Know thyself. I can’t change substantially, I can only try to manage the excess.

    So here’s what I have to add here, for what it’s worth. I’ve studied a vast amount of material on this and it is very rare to find someone suggesting that the syndrome can be cause by over-PERMISSIVE or simply ABSENTEE parents. My parents were not overprotective. During my childhood, we moved to a new state roughly every year. Every summer and holiday we flew to somewhere like Miami (read “Never Never Land”) to play on the beach and with the neighbors — we kids often spent the entire summer there. I was a smart and good looking kid and easily made friends everywhere I went. Almost every holiday we flew or drove somewhere. Disney Land. Grandma’s. Other relative’s homes where we kids were encouraged to just go to our thing but leave the adults alone (and so they left us alone.) I lived in 9 states by the age of 14, and attended 13 different schools in 10 different cities. To me, each time was an adventure. I couldn’t wait for the next move. Geography was my favorite subject, hands down. When we were “home”, I did what I wanted most of the time. I never had to worry about anything — it was all provided. Even education — I learned to read and do basic math in pre-school and the “head start” kept me ahead of the pack thru at least the seventh grade (I dropped to a C student in high school, and no one noticed.)

    My point is that my own PPS stems from HABIT. I did whatever I wanted, everywhere I went people/neighbor kids/girls/airline stewardesses/teachers/relatives/etc welcomed me as the new kid on the block and seemed to relish my “fun” spirit, tales of adventure and travel, and so forth, until they got tired of it. I was exhausting. Fortunately for them, we then moved again.

    So it’s not just overprotective parents. My parents were anything but overprotective. They didn’t ENCOURAGE reckless and careless behavior, they just didn’t much notice it, because they were self-absorbed or just not around. That went to a whole new level once my parents separated when I was 10 — then I had an apartment to myself (Dad was never there), a motorcycle and thousands of square miles to explore, a nice allowance (Dad gave me plenty of cash to buy my own groceries, school books, clothes, etc which I spent as I wanted), friends, girlfriends (from my age to about ten years older, the girls/women were plentiful, thanks in part to Dad and also to living in an apartment complex full of dirty old college girls.)

    I’m over 50. I’m still traveling, finding new adventures, meeting new people all the time, doing new things. Old habits die hard. I know myself. I’m okay with it.

    I can’t say that I’m completely happy. The lack of deep, lasting relationships is the main reason. I “substitute” one night stands and short term affairs for that, but it’s getting harder all the time. Especially since we Peter Pans like new younger women all the time. This is the my dilemma because I love the ladies and can’t/won’t commit.

    Unhealthy? No meaning? No purpose? Okay, maybe so. But I’m over 50 and in great health in every regard. People guess my age at late 30s. I ran a marathon last month. My BP is 110/70. I haven’t been to a doctor or dentist in the 21st century. I sleep like a baby, even if I sleep in a storage unit or at a hostel or on some stranger’s couch — all of which I do often because I don’t have or want a “real home” or a even a car. Today’s Tom Sawyer.

    It works for me. I’ve tried to not be myself and be a “responsible adult”. It was miserable and it just won’t work for me.

    No one is completely happy. In fact, happiness is not the normal human condition. Just the opposite. So many people today, especially in the West. think it’s common and normal, or supposed to be (supposed by whom? Themselves.)

    You make your own happiness. First, you must know thyself. If you’re a narcissistic PPS at age 50, the only way you’re going to have some happiness is to stop listening to the same voices of society you’ve been trying to drown out your whole life and make your own happiness doing whatever that means FOR YOU.

    We’re creatures of habit. Sure, stay at war with your bad habits. But being PPS is not a “bad habit.” It’s simply a habit. It may have some cons but it has it’s pros. Like most any “lifestyle.” It may be “bad” for society as a whole AS SOCIETY EXISTS TODAY.


    We do. And a billion other things and details and responsibilities.

    “Society” tends to compel conformity (and the mental health profession and associated literature is nothing if not a regulator of societal norms). Wittingly or not, “they” work to compel us toward unnatural, almost jackbooted behavior that is contrary to our nature.

    MODERN SOCIETY can’t work without a lot of responsible adults. And only “responsible adults” will be RESPONSIBLE when they allegedly responsible adults destroy it, as they inevitably will (probably when they let that first self-aware supercomputer cut loose — it will have no survival instinct with regard to itself, much less the humans which, to it, move at a speed far slower than a snail — by the time we can walk across a room, it’s evolved another trillion years in its time. What forces and such does it figure out by then?)

    So “society” is “right” and the PPS’s of the world are “wrong” or need to change? Right…

    People will keep sucking up, working themselves to death doing unnatural work (assembly lines! yikes), bowing down, doing the bidding of others, letting others fill their heads full of insane bullshit (like the myth of the magic zombie and other religions), tell them what to do, what to think, how to be, etc etc.

    Right up until they destroy not only our humanity, our naturalness, and our planet.

    The “good” cogs have habits too.

    Clearly the standard of what is “good” or “bad” behavior is, “Does it further the goals of modern society and its keepers, or no?”

    By that standard, I’ll have to side with all the other life on Earth that would love to see humans vanish before they compel other members of their own kind to believe in and embrace one more idea or project that will destroy their own kind.

    • Anonymous says:

      You are completely dismissing the damage that these folks do to those around them. It is not you against society norms, how narcissistic is only seeing that? It is narcissists causing needles pain and suffering to loved ones. The Narcissist, PPS folks being hugely narcissistic, goes through life completely unaware of the damage (s)he inflicts on others and does do damage. I don’t buy your argument. You have/had a family, my narcissist Dad has burned through most of his, and the damage he causes to those around him continues unabated, because he doesn’t think living the way he does causes problems! Wow, if only society would just loosen up a little, eh? There is a reason that most therapists would call narcissists untreatable – they really don’t think they’re doing anything wrong.

      • FoxyMcgee says:

        Bravo! Yeah from the above rant…it’s obvious this guy has no clue of the repercussions of his own delusional state. These people DO hurt others because of their narcissistic characteristics….but, they can’t acknowledge that. To acknowledge that would be to grow the F%*#& up and be an actual man that IS worthy of the attention they seek. These people could care less what damage they do to loved ones and friends as long as they are happy, what else matters? My opinion, but I wouldn’t want to sleep with someone that has the emotional brain capacity of a 5 year old. Something about that is very disturbing.

  • Guest says:

    I think i also have pps (assuming any kind of refusal to grow up is considered pps) but still very minor. If i just strengthen my will a little i’ll probably get through pps. I’m 21 female that goes to business college

    I believe the main reasons are:
    -i was being (and still, but less than before) spoiled by my mother as i’m the youngest daughter. <<– the main reason
    -i'm pretty lazy and kind of scared of the future, not to mention my sister and mom are active women, so the hurdle to 'meet their standard' is kinda…not low

    And yeah, what's the opposite of pps?

  • Dusty says:

    I think I have pps. I still live with my mother at 23 and I am not motivated to move out and grow up. I am into dragons, unicorns, I love my little pony. After reading this article I have come to see that I have all of the signs and symptoms listed above. I tried to go to my oldest sister because I thought she might understand but I keep getting told i’m making pps up and that i’m just being childish and I need to grow up. and I tell them, that’s the problem. I can not grow up.

  • Rynn says:

    i am finding by reading this that i have some or most of the symptoms of PPS. i am 30 and still live at home. i have a “part-time” job…which isn’t really part-time. i pay for my own cell phone, car insurance, and health insurance, i also buy most of my own groceries when i go out shopping.

    i have a habit of buying video games, movies, and books…actions figures i a have grown out of, i don’t buy stuffed animals, however i do sleep with a stuffed penguin…lol. my parents don’t and have never been overbearing or overprotected. i think i have lived a sheltered life more so than my brother who is 23 and already has two kids and is living mostly on his own. i also have never had a relationship. the one time i tried to have one i couldn’t commit. i would like to add that i am gay, not that it matters much, but seems to be common.

    don’t get me wrong i like having the life i do, i am just realizing that i am lonely and want to be free. explore and be more independent , but don’t really know how to. with being 30, i feel i am now too old or older than i should to want that much freedom. i will say i want to be a writer, i work now as a night stocker making more than any job pays around my area, i have even tried to start writing, but it is hard to get the time to do that and working and everything else. either way i am sorry for pouring my hear out and boring everyone with this. i just figured i would add a reply to other fellow like minded people and maybe people that might be able to help.

    • Andy says:

      My advice…. Save some money. Set a date. Maybe 6 months from now. Move out on your own. That’s a huge step.

      Then look for a “Tinker” (a strong woman who won’t put up with any BS) and not a “Wendy” (who will enable your bad habits). Write for fun, but don’t expect to make a living at it.

      Best wishes.

  • Andy says:

    “Peter Pan Syndrome” is a recent name given to an old phenomenon. Carl Jung used the term “Puer aeternus” describing one of his archetypes about a hundred years ago.

  • Tanys says:

    My 53 year old sperm donor still lives at home and refuses to leave. He has 3 children in which he does shit for. He’s very content to live the single, free and disengaged lifestyle that he loves so much meanwhile appearing to be a devoted father and husband. It all an illusion in their own mind that they are a perfect and desirable catch to women. All women want them and you should be “lucky” that they chose you. This lie and many more are what these sickos tell themselves to justify their rude, disrespectful, selfish behavior toward you. These people are very greedy and always have their hands stretched out for help but they are never there when you need help. They are always on the look out for their next conquest and are enraged if you point out any of their unacceptable whoremongering behavior These are people with no regard for anyone but themselves, they run from any form of responsibility. NEVER. NEVER take their advice. They live for the moment with no regards for the future, they will sacrifice you your kids anything that means anything to you to get their way. I lost my home because I was told to abandon it and move to the USA big mistake> I didn’t realize that He was secretly jealous of my achievement. Once I got to the USA the bad treatment began, bullying, verbal abuse you name it. He ran back to mommas or really never left her house since he has always to this day maintained a bedroom there. The thought of him missing his mommas cooking and her company was too much to bear so he caused drama after drama fully knowing that I would up and leaving him, It worked I left him. He drove me and the kids home to my sisters (because I’m now homeless with 3 kids) It took 3 days and before we left on the trip back to my sister’s he already had lined up his new conquests. His “best friend” called me before I left to tell me how much he hates my cooking and that Im a lousy mom all this info was given to her by him mind you this man has NEVER paid a dime in child support, my A student kids are a result of my homeschooling and sacrifice meanwhile he has done NOTHING .This excuse of a man now 53 is still at home drives a ice-cream truck and lives his fantasy to be loved and admired by all the little kids that really do not know him. These people are all full of tricks, don’t believe anything they say. They will manipulate out of everything. They will use you take from you and skin and grin in your face and act like they love you all the while turning the knife in you back a little more, then when you complain to them they will say what’s the problem or as mine would say when I confronted and I complained “That I just don’t know when to shut up”. They tolerate no other opinion other than theirs because in their minds they are smarter than you. I went off on mine when I found a nude picture of one of his “friends” on his phone. This incident armed him with my new diagnosis of “PRE-MENOPAUSAL. That’s what he tells everyone that I’m “CRAZY”. Are people dumb or is it they refuse to think, He has had this same MO for decades and it seems everyone has fallen for his crap, especially his mommy. My advice run don’t give them a dime. DON”T buy them nothing, do not feel sorry for them and keep ALL your business to yourself anything you tell them they will spread to others in an attempt to make you look bad. Once you have had enough and have left their no good ass they will try to find you to “apologize” don’t believe it its about CONTROL. if you have to change your number, move, go into police protection do whatever you have to do keep them away from you until they are ready to admit that THEY have a problem, we all know that this would NEVER happen so be prepared to put them behind you and move on as I’m trying to do. Its difficult to believe that there are people that can inflict so much pain and suffering in other peoples lives but face reality that they have major problems, no amount of money or love will help them so face it, You made some poor choice and move on cut off all contact because they will always manipulate you with their lies for as long as you allow it. Cut them off now!

    • Anonymous says:

      I so feel your pain. I did not run and 20 years later nothing has changed except he is now doing 18 year old prostitutes while claiming he has changed. The only change is more whores and more manipulation….

  • Nance says:

    All of these comments have been helpful. I am 64 and have been dating a 60 year old PPS man. I thought I was going out of my mind until a friend told me about PPS. I immediately ordered the PPS book and the Wendy Dilemma book. I learned that there are different degrees of PPS from your helpful comments. In the books I learned that he has a mild form of PPS and that I am a “Tinkerbelle” with a tad bit of Wendy. I just sent him the PPS book yesterday and I am anxious to find out if he will own the PPS and try to better himself and our relationship. I do love him deeply and he loves me. At our age everyone has baggage and I am willing to put up with lighter baggage and not the heavier ones. I thank you all for posting your comments.

  • Rama says:

    All my life I have been living with Over Protective Parents , even at the age of 33 I still do, I have had the opportunity to live away from my parents when I was working in a different city for two years during this time I felt very confident of my self I could actually feel the difference, the company where I was came under new management the new management after a breif period shut down the company hence had to return to city where I was born since then have attended several interviews not yet got a job,living with my overprotective mother , father as well as Aunt is making me weaker, after reading your post on Peter Pan Syndrome I do exibit some sings of having it , such as

    Frustration that leads to self-pity and depression.

    Manipulative tendencies.

    Low Self Esteem ,Self Confidence, Low on Courage.

    Dis – Interest in everything.

    At times being Over Emotional and Over Sentimental about everything.

    Another point about OverProtective Parents is that they enage in Emotional Blackmail to be with them, they want me to be with them , and it is tough for me to leave them as all three are old my aunt is 80 years , my father is 78 years and my mother is 67 years they need someone to support them I have to be all the time with them. Apart from the syndrome you had mentioned there could be other conditions affecting people like yes I do have Dyslexia and Attention Deficit Syndrome which does come in my way in fact living with my parents in a way is strenghting it and making me weaker. I am still unemployed inspite of being qualified. Could you suggest something.

  • ricardo says:

    I am a 42 years old men and I did not know about the pps .I sew it on tv this morning and this syndrome describe my self . I cant have relationships no friends no girlfriend I feel my self immature and I am insecure I act like teen . don’t see my life like a 42 man . I have lots to said . but finally I found what is my problem . thank you.

  • E.S. says:

    Approaching 50, I just discovered yesterday I may have this PPS ! so I’m looking for more information and this is a very interesting article (and comments). Very good to see some treatments options, too ! better than the usual “go see a psychiatrist”, for sure !

    I also like the funny Peter Narc story, would love to have his health and luck, although I think he may now find the love if his life, and “grow up” a bit. I have to read the comments section again !

    This year I also found I’m suffering from a rare genetic disorder (Marfan Syndrome), by chance, on the internet, after being unsuccessful to identify the cause of the various symptoms for all my life, and that’s after consulting a few doctors since I’m 14 years old !

    Thanks to Dr. Amarendra ! I have to bookmark this page and website !

  • flexdoc says:

    Just one more effort on the part of the psychological community to classify people. There are no have to’s. Its all nonsense to me.

  • anonymous says:

    I am a 25 year old female with suspected pps. The way I act, it all fits. I am intelligent and insightful but have severe child like behaviors. Glad I finally pinpointed what it could be.

    • Tina says:

      Hi I’m 52 yr old gay female and today its just dawned on me I must have PPS.
      I head straight for the toy departments drawn by the colours, happy faces, moving bits and bobs interesting sounds and the potential joy the toy could bring me if I had it and someone equally young at heart to play with it too like a kite, paddling pool, board games anything silly.
      I always thought I was “childish” but now more its called female PPS.
      I need a Wendy to look after me and realise that’s the sort of tough sensible maternal type I’ve always settled down and lived with. Sadly I am now alone after17 years of my “Wendy” looking after me.
      I in return brought spiritual gifts like joy, freedom, chatter, support, affection, optimism and spontaneity to the relationship..
      She went off with someone who is 20 years her junior and 30 years younger than me, a real shock. My replacement is everything I’m not – Answer is there really- independent, motivated, dependable and could probably look after my ex.

      Perhaps we were both PPS ladies so doomed as neither could face financial problems or could cope with stress. We both got ill, angry, bored and resentful.
      She turned into a nagging wife which made me go more like a teenager. She would become furious and call me a baby- so it escalated into hate.
      It all happened so fast but I think both of us changed or at least changed what we were willing to give up to make the other partner happy.
      A nasty painful Selfish battle of wills.
      A very miserable home I used to sit outside on the driveway unable to get out of my car.
      Sometimes I’d run away from home stamp off round the block like a teen and smiled as her car pulled up beside me to pick me up with a cheerful “come on home you daft thing” jst like my Dad my hero did.
      A new home now alone, cooking alone, fending for myself alone no friends no plans of a new partner as I am toxic and cannot be anything other than childlike and cannot face tough people but I’m surrounded by Captain Hooks
      So you are not alone- I am now scared to face the world alone each day and don’t sleep at night as she used to talk to me so I wasn’t afraid of the dark and reassure me there was nothing that we could not fix together.
      I spent years blaming her for my unhappiness but now see the light. I must be honest and upfront and say I am a clumsy , unlucky childlike irresponsible middle-aged lady who can’t bare a day with no laughs or adventure.
      Not a very good C.V for an employee or chat up line for a lonely hearts column.
      There are worse things to be in life so I act daft and respond to conflict like a child- avoid conflict / nasty people, and be free and happy do fun jolly stuff each day.
      Who wants to be a grown up.
      That’s why so many people drink and do drugs because they wish they could be forget their cares like us for the weekend.
      We get that high on life daily naturally so we are blessed .

  • […] Who Would Never Grow Up, in 1904. This book is one of the most popular fantasies for children. The Peter Pan Syndrome is the dilemma of growing up when you really don’t want to. There really is no fix-all for […]

  • Anonymous says:

    ok i got it..

  • Maryellen says: has potential, you can make your site go viral easily using one
    tricky method. Just search in google:
    Isud’s Method To Go Viral

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.